Is Your Church Martha or Mary?

My family and I are in a period of transition. The military will be transferring me from my current duty station to a new location next month. My wife and kids moved two months ago so that the kids could start and end school in the same system. The last two months have been challenging but nothing we can’t handle. With a transfer comes the search for a new church.

During the last couple of years I’ve had a lot of frustrations with the church that we were attending and I’m finding some of those same frustrations in our search for a new one. It’s caused me to take a close look at what church is, what it should be, and what my role in that church is.

 I attended one church for a few years that had a couple dozen different ministries and programs. In addition to the standard children’s, youth, and women, there was girls, boys, fitness, knitting, military, youth home missions, people who ride motorcycles, adult missions, public elementary school outreach, community outreach, and several others. Now, all of these things are good and serve to get people involved in a community of like interests and show God’s love through everyday activities. But is it the church’s job to host and endorse all of these programs?

At one point, one of the leaders of this church stood up on a Sunday morning and said that our church was being looked at as a model for other churches to follow in one of these ministry areas. Wow! That’s pretty cool. The only problem was that there were several families that I knew of that  were going through divorces and another half dozen were on the verge of divorce. I saw many, many teenagers (including one of my own) walking away from the Lord. It got me thinking about what we were focused on. It seemed to me that we were so focused on reaching out that we forgot how to reach in. We were so focused on looking good on the outside that we were rotting away on the inside.

As we have been looking for other churches and filling out the visitor cards, I’ve noticed that a lot of other churches have the same things going on. “Check the box of the ministry area that interests you” followed by a list of areas to get connected.  I’ve heard so many sermons (including one this week) telling Christians that we are too busy; that we need to slow down and take time to read the bible, pray, and be with our families. But the church doesn’t encourage that with the dozens of programs, services, bible studies, home groups, and other specialty groups.

                “As Jesus and His desciples were on their way, He came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to Him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what He said. But Martha WAS DISTRACTED by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to Him and asked, ‘Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!’ ‘Martha, Martha,’ the Lord answered, ‘you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed-or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.’” Luke 10:38-42

Martha definitely had the right heart. When we have guests in our homes, especially VIPs, we want to show our best. We want the house to be clean and the food to be good and the children to behave. So, we spend much time making sure that all those things are perfect for our guest. Some of us just want to appear busy. Some of us wear stress like a badge of honor. I think that churches often do the same things. The work of the Kingdom has distracted us from truly seeing the King.

Most Christians come to know Christ through a friend or coworker who lives a life that reflects God’s love to the people around them, not through a church program. I don’t have a statistic or study to back that up, but I will say this: If that isn’t true, then shame on us! We spend more time away from church and church activities than we do in those areas (unless you’re a pastor, of course). If you need to be involved in a church program for people to know that you’re a Christian, then there are bigger problems and that may be a blog for another day.

So, what is the solution for the church? Keep in mind that I’m not a pastor and I don’t have a theological degree or credential. I guess you might call me a bit of a Monday Morning Quarterback. I’m just a guy who loves the Lord. I’m a guy who’s seen a lot of “Marthas” in the church. I’ve seen a lot of churches who act like Martha. Shoot! I’ve BEEN Martha! So Pastors, feel free to correct my thinking.

 I understand that many of these ministries are the result of God’s calling for a person to fulfill, especially the ones that involve reaching out to the communities outside of the church.There are certain missions callings that would require an endorsement and financial support, but those are specific, specialized callings. If you feel led to get a group of people together and go work on a Habitat House, just go do it. If you want to volunteer at Teen Challenge, go do it. If you want to do some work for Wounded Warriers, go do it. Grab some of your co-workers and neighbors. You don’t need permission from the church. You don’t need an endorsement. The pastor should give you encouragement, prayer support, and equip you to be successful in your calling through training and guidance. 

If we use the combat analogy that Christians like to use, then the church is a training command; bootcamp for new believers, intermediate training for experienced combat veterans and “field” leaders, and advanced training for leaders who have combat experience and will serve as trainers for the new believers and intermediate level “soldiers.” The church is also an aid station for those that are wounded or combat weary.

The real battle is in our homes, our workplaces, our schools, the grocery store, Starbucks, etc.We wage our battles when our teenage daughters want to date boys that we know are bad for them. We are in the thick of the fight when our bosses ask us to do something unethical or dishonest. We are dodging bullets when a friend doesn’t want to hear a hard truth about something destructive that they are doing. We run over an IED when we fall into the temptation of pornography. All of these things take their toll on a fragile human. The church needs to be the place where the soldiers of God can step back from the fight, rest, re-arm, get something to eat, and get back into the fight for the next week.

I think of the scene at the end of the movie “Black Hawk Down” where they’ve come back to the base after two days of fighting. They are tired, dirty, hungry, wounded, and out of bullets. You can see the look complete exhaustion on the faces of the Soldiers and know that the only things that each of them really want are a hot shower, some hot food, and to go home. Then, Eric Bana’s character starts reloading his weapon and magazines. He grabs a bottle of water and throws some food down his throat and heads back into the fight. His reason is that there are still men out there dying at the hands of the enemy. Then, the others get up and do the same thing…for the same reason.

Friends, does your church have a dozen outreach programs but doesn’t acknowledge the hurting people inside the walls of the church? If your church is not a place of refuge from the battles of the week; if it is not a place where the commanders (pastors, elders, deacons, “mature Christians”)give you a plan of attack for the upcoming week; if it is not a place to rest, recharge and re-arm; if it is not a place that bandages your wounds, whether they are self-inflicted, friendly fire, or the result of an enemy ambush, then let me assure you, there are places where you can go that will achieve all of these things. It may not be the mega-church with 4 services and 5000 members (but then again, it might be). It might be that home church with only a few families or somewhere in between. Maybe this post is the confirmation that the Lord is giving you to be that change in your church.

Jesus tells us to be a light in a dark world. When the battery starts to run low and the light starts to dim, we need to come back and refresh. The world needs each of us to be bright each and every day. It’s the only way that they will come to know the love of a Savior. You need to be in a place that will charge that battery.

 

 

A Question for the Road Time Readers (all 3 of you)

What is the purpose of "church"? Why do we go to this building on Sunday mornings? Sing some nice songs; listen to a guy talk about the bible, life, troubles, politics, work, etc.?

I'm curious to know your reasons. What do you look for in a church? Are you committed to a denomination? Why?

This is part of an ongoing struggle I've been having with church over the last few years. Now that my family has moved to a new area and we are in the midst of a search, these questions are weighing heavier with me. It's even harder since my wife and kids are doing the search largely without me.

You can respond on the site below, comment on the Facebook post, or send me a private email. I'll probably do a follow-up post in a week or two with some results of the query. Don't worry. The names will be left out to protect...well...me.

Focus and prioritize!

In 1997 I was starting to really follow Christ. I had grown up in the church. I prayed. I knew of God, but I didn’t really have a relationship with Him until then. I guess you could say that I was “saved” at that time, but I really think, for me, salvation has been more of a process than a single event. Maybe that’s a little heretical for some. All I know is “Christ and Christ crucified.” I don’t remember the day and time that I came to this revelation as some do, but I really don’t think it matters.

The big thing at that time was the “Left Behind” series by Tim LaHaye and Jerry Jenkins. These books were HUGE! They chronicled the biblical events of the second coming of Christ. I must admit. I bought into the hype. I was mildly addicted to the series.  I remember the hand-wringing anticipation for the next book. What was going to happen to Buck and Rayford and Chloe? Every book ended on a cliff hanger. The funny thing is, there were people in the church who were really getting on my case about reading these books. Some even said that I shouldn’t be reading them at all. They were warning me that they are the author’s interpretation of the bible and are not a substitute for the bible itself. Thanks. Do you wanna check the presets for the radio stations in my car and make sure there aren’t any secular stations on there too?

I was a new Christian, but the “end times” stuff really fascinated me. The good thing about it for me and many others was that it ended up being a gateway to intense study in other areas of the bible. I was in a small men’s group that met once a week for coffee and prayer. One of the guys asked if I thought that the rapture was going to be pre-tribulation, mid-tribulation, or if there was even going to be such a thing. I remember saying, “Man, I’m still trying to figure out how to love my neighbor!”

The bible has a lot of commandments, guides, instructions, wisdom, stories of success, stories of failure, and hope for the future. With 66 books, 1,189 chapters, and 31,240 verses it can be a lot for most people to absorb and apply to their lives. In a lot of cases, churches or denominations will just focus on one or two things; worship; baptism and communion; or missions work and evangelism; or snake handling and poison drinking; or end times; or works. People will gravitate to the churches that focus on the areas that interest them or that they are comfortable with. I’m not suggesting that any of these things are bad because they all have their foundation in the Word of God. However, I might suggest that we as individual Christians refocus on what God considers the priorities.

Tell us, Pat. What are God’s priorities? I’m glad you asked, but let me first put out a disclaimer in an attempt to avoid a lightning strike. “ALL SCRIPTURE is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness.” 2 Timothy 3:16  Now that the lightening rod is firmly in place, here are God’s priorities: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength. The second is this: Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:30-31. I believe that all scripture exists to support these two commandments…which are in the red, by the way. Jesus said that there is no commandment greater than this.

Thanks, Pat. We’ve been to Sunday school. We know this. So, what is the practical application? You want me to bake some cookies for my neighbors? Sure, if that’s what you want to do. Look. For most of us, God is not going to send us to a third world country to build a church. God will command some to do that. It's necessary and if you are called to do that, GO! But most of us are called to worship Him in our car on our way to work or while we are out for a jog (I wouldn’t recommend closing your eyes and raising your hands in either of those situations, however).  We are all called to get to know Him, His mind, His will, and His Word. We do that by spending time alone with Him intimately in prayer and study. We also do that by gathering with people who are committed to the same thing and learning from their experiences, successes, and failures. 

Loving our neighbors can be a bit tougher…especially if you lived in my previous neighborhood! When Jesus was asked what it meant to love our neighbor, He told the story of the Good Samaritan. How do we apply that? Try this: The next time you’re in line at Starbucks, buy a coffee for the person in line behind you. Maybe just hand the cashier an extra $6 for that purpose and don’t even let the person know what you did. When you go to work or to the store, put your antennae up and see if you can find a person that looks lonely or is having a rough day. Then, offer them some comfort; an ear or a cup of coffee (yes, I’m a coffee addict too) or a shoulder. A hug and a smile can do wonders for someone going through a storm. Use some discretion, though. You could end up in handcuffs! People who are hurting, especially the ones that don’t know the Lord, don’t always want to hear that God loves them. But most will welcome a loving word or gesture from you and THAT comes from the Lord. And yes, bake some cookies for your neighbors.

A note for the people around me: I like caramel macchiatos and chocolate chip cookies.

Poverty of Muscle

I hate going to the gym. There are a lot of reasons, but I think the real reason is pride. If I go run, I can run by myself. I don’t have to keep up with anyone or worry about slowing them down. I can put on my headphones and go into my own little world. At the gym there are all those muscle-bound, gym dwellers that walk around wearing shirts that are about 4 sizes too small, protein drinks in one hand and a 100lb dumbbell in the other…and that’s just the women! I always feel so self-conscious going in with my spaghetti arms and spare-tire waist and strain with a 25lb curl. I suppose you have to start somewhere and I’m sure that those folks realize that, but I can’t help but feel the eyes of judgment.

Why do we bother even exercising anyway? For some of us it is vanity. Some of us enjoy the feeling of being in good health. For others it is a job requirement. Some were told by a doctor that they had to or their family will be collecting on their life insurance. For me, it is a combination of a few. Whatever the reason, the starting point is the realization that we are not where we need or want to be. We have a shortage of physical fitness. We have a need to make a change to our physical lifestyle because our habits have led us to be overweight, diabetic, to have heart problems,  or a host of other health issues. We have identified a need for a change.

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” Matt 5:3

Isn’t this the same for our spiritual lives as well? As Christians, at some point we recognized that doing things on our own wasn’t working. Maybe we were in an abusive relationship, addicted to drugs, alcohol, or pornography. Maybe we've walked away from God and are too ashamed to come back. Perhaps we just had such a low opinion of ourselves that we didn’t think we were worthy of “the kingdom of heaven.”  Theologian and author, A.W Tozer calls this “poverty of the soul.” What a great turn of phrase! What does it mean to be “poor” or in “poverty”? It means that you have a desperate need. That is us when we realize our need for a Savior.

So, what now? If you go to the gym when you’re in need of physical training, where would you go if you were in need of spiritual fulfillment? Church? That seems like the obvious answer, but it would be wrong…at least to start. There are certain things that are built into our sinful DNA that might make that trip counterproductive. Remember those muscle-bound, gym dwellers? Well, they exist in the church too. They are the “super Christians” that were saved in the womb. They are the ones that always have the smile that never fades and, on the outside, appear as if they’ve never had an illness, a bounced check, or uttered a swear word. They have good intentions…mostly, but they can be pretty intimidating sometimes and we can feel self-conscious in their presence until we come to grips with who we are in the sight of God. (Note: If you're one of those "super Christians" keep reading before you get offended.) The sooner we realize that it’s not their approval we seek, but the forgiveness and grace of the Father, the sooner we can break down the shame of our spiritual poverty.

From “The Pursuit of God” by A. W. Tozer:

                “…the burden of pretense [is]…the common human desire to put the best foot forward and hide from the world our real inward poverty. For sin has played many evil tricks upon us, and one has been the infusing into us a false sense of shame. …The fear of being found out gnaws like rodents within their hearts.”

If church isn’t the right answer, what is? Hebrews 4:16 says, “Let us therefore come BOLDLY to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” Need = poverty. Don’t go timidly. Don’t go shamefully. Don’t go thinking that God is like Caesar at the coliseum wondering if he is going to give you a thumbs up or thumbs down. Go BOLDLY! When we realize that the world will never see us the way that God does, we will no longer be self-conscious about charging to the throne of grace. We will go to the altar and kneel before Jesus and take His yoke upon us and learn from Him. And we will find rest from the daily grind of trying to cover up our inadequacies so that no one will find out. Then we can go to the gym (or church) and begin the work of physical or spiritual fitness with a “trainer” who is in good shape and can guide us to fitness so that we can be the trainer for others struggling with their poverty. That’s when you realize that those “super Christians” or “gym dwellers” are the same as you. They just recognized their poverty before you did and went boldly to the gym.

What We Think We Deserve

I was a really skinny kid. In high school I ran cross country and track and was in fairly good shape. When I joined the Navy I continued to ride that wave. I rarely worked out if ever. I did my semi-annual physical training test and passed without much effort. I never had a problem with my weight no matter what or how much I ate. Then, I hit my 30^th birthday and that wave crashed on the rocks…HARD! Now, every six months I’m scrambling to lose those last few pounds before my weigh-in. The last few years I have been regularly exercising and watching my diet. I routinely run between 18-23 miles per week and I’m still about 10 pounds over what the Navy says I can weigh. What is even more frustrating is seeing some of the folks around me eat whatever they want, rarely, if ever, exercise and are skinny as rails! I have been working my tail off for years! I even ran a marathon for crying out loud! It is not fair that I have to work so hard for so little and others can eat whatever they want, never work out, and never have any problems with their weight or fitness.

In Matthew 20, Jesus tells a story about a landowner who hired several workers to work his vineyard. The ones that he hired early in the day were hired with the understanding that they would be paid a day’s wage. When the landowner paid the ones that were hired later in the day the same amount as the ones he hired early in the day, the ones who had worked longer were angry because they felt that they deserved more than the others since they had worked longer.

There are times when we feel like we are entitled to certain things from God because we serve Him. We go to church. We pray. We read our Bibles. We serve our communities. We love our families. But when we see someone that has more and does less for God, we become envious or question why God has apparently blessed someone more than us. As sinners, we love the account of the thief on the cross next to Christ (Luke 23: 39-43). To know that our redemption is not dependant on our works but on recognition of His sacrifice for us is a very comforting thought. But how do we view other sinners in light of the work that we do for the Kingdom? Do we feel like we deserve a higher place in heaven because we led a Bible study or worked in a soup kitchen or built a church in a developing country?

Our pastor’s daughter died a couple of years ago. She was such a beautiful lady, a devoted servant of God, and an absolute joy to be around. She did not deserve to have cancer invade her body and suffer the pain of a slow and agonizing death. Her parents who have served God for over 40 years did not deserve to have to watch their daughter suffer and die. How is that fair?

A friend of mine once told me that God is NOT fair. If God was fair, we would all burn in hell for our sin. THAT is what we deserve.The question that we really need to ask ourselves when these thoughts start creeping in is, “does God love me less than someone who has more “blessings” than I do?” The answer is no. He died for all of us. He suffered the same penalty for each of us equally. So, then the question becomes “am I seeking the Giver or the gift?” Do I only love God because of what I hope He might do for me or do I love Him for what He has already done?  Do I serve Him because He is worth my service? Do I love Him because He first loved me? Matthew 6:33 “But seek first HIS kingdom and HIS righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”

Getting Recharged

In my last two posts I was in a recovery mode from an injury. The time that I spent running was limited so that I could heal and regain strength. This week I seem to be back to full steam...mostly. It would have been very easy to allow the injury to completely derail my workouts. It does for many people. A few days on the couch turns into a couple of weeks. After a month, the thought of working out brings back those agonizing memories from starting a workout plan all over again...motrin, ice, limping, moaning. Sometimes we negotiate a deal to simply eat healthier and forego the workouts. In my case that is laughable! I have a particular weakness for bacon and wings.

I think we do this in our spiritual lives too. I wrote in a previous blog about getting burned out. Some of us just decide that we'll pray, read our bibles, and go to church, and little more. While these things are vital, I would equate it to "hiding your light under a basket" as the scripture says. The phrase "I'll pray for you" seems to be a common utterance and probably more equal to "the check is in the mail."

Don't get me wrong. Sometimes prayer is the ONLY thing we can do; When we have a sick friend or family member; when someone is in need of financial provision and it is just not in our budget to help. But I have heard for years that we need to pray for revival in the church. Okay. I'll buy that, but I think if we pray for strength, wisdom, and guidance for ourselves, we can go into the world and use what God has given us to instigate a revival. Think about Peter on the day of Pentecost. Powered by the Holy Spirit, Peter spoke to the masses and thousands were added to their number. He didn't wait for God to add them.

Imagine a dead battery. It is pretty useless. Kind of like us when we're burned out or injured. Now put that battery in a charger (prayer, bible study, meditation, etc). Whatever we use the battery for cannot be used until it is charged, but while it is being charged, it is still pretty useless. Sometimes it is great to just sit in the charger. Why would Moses ever want to come down off that mountain? But the work of God is not getting done by us as long as we're on the charger. Either someone else is doing it (and getting burned out) or it's not getting done at all.

Think about it this way. David did not slay Goliath from his knees. Nehemiah did not build a wall from his knees. Joshua did not lead his army to victory from his knees. Every one of these warriors unplugged once they were fully charged and did what needed to be done with the power that they had been given. We cannot bring the Gospel to our neighbors, co-workers, children, or communities until we unplug from the charger, come down from the mountain, and GET OFF OUR KNEES.

To paraphrase Francis of Assissi (I think), "Pray as if everything depends on God, for it does. Work as if everything depends on you, for it does."

...but don't forget to plug back in...

Get Up And Go!

I don’t intend on blogging every day, but my brain was particularly noisy this morning and hasn’t quieted much since.  I was walking this morning because I’m still recovering from that pulled ligament last week. While I was walking, I was listening to scripture. In Matthew 9 Jesus comes across a paralyzed man. He forgave the man’s sins and instructed him to get up and go home.  There is so much in this event to talk about, but I want to focus on a couple of things.

What sin had this man committed that had rendered him paralyzed? I have a friend that I have repeatedly invited to a bible study. He keeps declining the invitation because, according to him, he wants to get some things in his life straightened out before he gets involved in bible studies or church. He doesn’t want to feel like a hypocrite because he smokes and swears and drinks occasionally. I would say that he has allowed the condition of his heart to paralyze his spiritual growth. In my blog yesterday, I wrote that I was so disillusioned by the actions and words of others in the church that I allowed my spiritual growth to be paralyzed.

When Jesus tells us that our sins are forgiven, he has removed the thing that paralyzed our growth. I find it interesting that once this man’s sins were forgiven and whatever was holding him back was removed, Jesus still had to tell him to get up and go. I think about a dog in a yard with one of those invisible fences. The dog wears a collar that gives him a shock if he beyond a certain point. Eventually, the dog learns where the boundaries are and doesn’t go beyond them. After several years of having this collar on, what happens when we remove it? Nothing. The dog has become so accustomed to living within these boundaries that he is afraid to go beyond them. That is, until the Master tells him that it is okay.  Go.

Sometimes as Christians, we are afraid to “go”. We are bound by fear or pride or shame of our past or *insert shock collar here*. We behave as if we are still paralyzed even though our sins are forgiven. We act as if the shock collar is still on even though the Master has removed it. I think about times when I’ve been convicted of something that I had done. Depending on the severity, sometimes I’m so ashamed that I can’t even bring myself to ask God for forgiveness, much less the person I hurt. When I quiet the shame enough to hear His voice say, “Your sins are forgiven,” it still feels like I can’t move. Then He says, “Now GET UP AND GO!”

What is paralyzing you today? Know this. Jesus is the Great Physician that heals the paralyzed. He is the Master. He forgives your sins and removes the collar that is keeping you bound. Seek His forgiveness and you will have it. The collar has been removed. NOW GET UP AND GO!