What We Think We Deserve

I was a really skinny kid. In high school I ran cross country and track and was in fairly good shape. When I joined the Navy I continued to ride that wave. I rarely worked out if ever. I did my semi-annual physical training test and passed without much effort. I never had a problem with my weight no matter what or how much I ate. Then, I hit my 30^th birthday and that wave crashed on the rocks…HARD! Now, every six months I’m scrambling to lose those last few pounds before my weigh-in. The last few years I have been regularly exercising and watching my diet. I routinely run between 18-23 miles per week and I’m still about 10 pounds over what the Navy says I can weigh. What is even more frustrating is seeing some of the folks around me eat whatever they want, rarely, if ever, exercise and are skinny as rails! I have been working my tail off for years! I even ran a marathon for crying out loud! It is not fair that I have to work so hard for so little and others can eat whatever they want, never work out, and never have any problems with their weight or fitness.

In Matthew 20, Jesus tells a story about a landowner who hired several workers to work his vineyard. The ones that he hired early in the day were hired with the understanding that they would be paid a day’s wage. When the landowner paid the ones that were hired later in the day the same amount as the ones he hired early in the day, the ones who had worked longer were angry because they felt that they deserved more than the others since they had worked longer.

There are times when we feel like we are entitled to certain things from God because we serve Him. We go to church. We pray. We read our Bibles. We serve our communities. We love our families. But when we see someone that has more and does less for God, we become envious or question why God has apparently blessed someone more than us. As sinners, we love the account of the thief on the cross next to Christ (Luke 23: 39-43). To know that our redemption is not dependant on our works but on recognition of His sacrifice for us is a very comforting thought. But how do we view other sinners in light of the work that we do for the Kingdom? Do we feel like we deserve a higher place in heaven because we led a Bible study or worked in a soup kitchen or built a church in a developing country?

Our pastor’s daughter died a couple of years ago. She was such a beautiful lady, a devoted servant of God, and an absolute joy to be around. She did not deserve to have cancer invade her body and suffer the pain of a slow and agonizing death. Her parents who have served God for over 40 years did not deserve to have to watch their daughter suffer and die. How is that fair?

A friend of mine once told me that God is NOT fair. If God was fair, we would all burn in hell for our sin. THAT is what we deserve.The question that we really need to ask ourselves when these thoughts start creeping in is, “does God love me less than someone who has more “blessings” than I do?” The answer is no. He died for all of us. He suffered the same penalty for each of us equally. So, then the question becomes “am I seeking the Giver or the gift?” Do I only love God because of what I hope He might do for me or do I love Him for what He has already done?  Do I serve Him because He is worth my service? Do I love Him because He first loved me? Matthew 6:33 “But seek first HIS kingdom and HIS righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”